Justin Bieber has done the one thing that most people could not believe he could, fathered a child. Well, so claims this california lady. 

Setting all conjecture about his ambiguous gender straight, the Biebernator has flat out sired a child, atleast according to the mother of the aforementioned mostrosity. She has even called for a paternity test (heh) to conclusively prove that Justin the Faustian is the biological father of her three month old child. I’d like to point out that this is a twenty year old woman and not a prepubescent bag of hormones and giggles. Really, she ought to have known better. 

The Jay-Biebs camp however, have failed to seize the oppurtunity to finally clear all doubts, and declined allegations of any heterosexual activity on Bieb’s part. Ever.

In the midst of the media hoopla, however, only one question remains. Why are women actually having sex with him?

[youtube_video id=kffacxfA7G4]

Also, this song now can be read in a whole new level. Whoaa!

Also, uh, also Biebertron has hit two billion views on youtube, beating Lady Gaga to the throne of Most Viewed Youtube Artist. Here is a new video, to spread some christmas cheer among the more murderous of our reader-base.

[youtube_video id=LUjn3RpkcKY]

Really, who is sleeping with this guy? 

Apparently, The only real competition that Justin the Biebarbarian has left is Nyan Cat.